Why Is It So Hard to Get Out of Your Comfort Zone – 3 Main Reasons

“Life begins at the end of your comfort zone.”

Neale Donald Walsch

One of my favorite quotes of all time, because it has so much truth to it.

But let’s see now, why is it so hard to get out of your comfort zone?

So, here are the 3 main reasons why.

Table of Contents

How can we define the comfort zone?

One definition of the comfort zone, according to Oxford Dictionary, is:

“A situation where one feels safe or at ease.

And let’s see now, how comfort zone is defined, according to the Cambridge Dictionary:

“A situation in which you feel comfortable and in which your ability and determination are not being tested.”

It kind of feels like it’s an energy saving mode, which runs on autopilot. Doesn’t it?

Why is it so hard to get out of your comfort zone?

Why is it so hard to get out of your comfort zone
  • We often get too comfortable with our routines and with the people in our lives, thus change can be scary.
  • Also, it can be hard to let go of what’s familiar, even if it’s not necessarily what’s best for us.
  • And at the same time, we may not even be aware that we’re in a comfort zone, so we can easily get in our own way, without even realizing it.

So, let see the 3 reasons, why is it so hard to get out of your comfort zone.

1) Because you got stuck – Got used to that comfort too much

And if you get used to being in comfort too much, then you get stuck, and it’s hard to get out of there, or to get started with anything.

You can imagine it the following way:

For anything, that you are doing in life, you are spinning a spiral, you’re slowly getting used to it, and a habit is created out of it.

Negative downward spiral
  • If you usually lay back after work, then you spin the “getting comfortable” spiral.
  • If you usually put in some extra effort after work, then you spin the “working hard” spiral.
  • And if you usually play a few hours of video games after dinner, then you spin the “laying back” spiral each time you do it, which is, again, the getting comfortable one.

I hope you get the point.

So, basically, each time we do that activity, we give it a spin.

  • The more often and the longer we do that thing, and with the more intensity, the faster that spiral is going to spin.
  • And when it spins too fast in the wrong direction, that’s basically when we can say, that we got stuck somewhere.
  • Plus, let’s not forget, that the faster this spiral spins, the harder it will be to stop it, to break that cycle, and to move it in the other direction.

So, basically, we train ourselves that way.     

We train our body and brain to get used to something, by repeatedly doing it.

And unfortunately, we get used to it.

And we can get used to anything.

Literally anything.

Here’s an example for that – Our grandparent’s generation

One great examples for this, is our grandparent’s generation, compared to our generation.

our grandparent's generation

50-60 years ago it was a completely different world.

  • There was war, all around the world.
  • They couldn’t travel whenever or wherever they wanted, so their freedom was limited.
  • Plus, they had to work for much longer hours, and they had to do much harder tasks, without having the “work from home” option.

And today’s generation? We complain a lot about so much nonsense, YET, we live in a much easier world, in a world with much more opportunities and freedom, compared to what they had back then.

Of course, those times back then had their beauties and advantages as well, and they were complaining as well, but that’s not the point right now.

In so many ways, it was much harder for our grandparents, yet, they managed to adapt to the difficulty of the situation.


They got used to it, and they adapted.


Because they had no choice.

And they say, that we perform so well under high pressure. But WHERE is that high-pressure, when we get too comfortable in our own world?

Maybe this is one of our biggest enemies.


Because when the difficulty got much easier, then the level of complaints got more ridiculous as well with it.

Can this be a clear proof, that we can adapt to hard times, and good times as well, regardless of its difficulty? (Maybe.)

But one thing you should definitely take away from all this. When we have too much comfort, for too long in our lives, we will get used to it, and we will get stuck in there.

So, if you ask why is it so hard to get out of your comfort zone, then understand, that this is one of the main reasons why.

2) Fear of uncertainty – Negative mindset

Fear of uncertainty

If we’re in that downward spiral of being too comfortable, we start
to have these negative mindsets, which are keep repeating in our head.

This means, that:

  • We start telling all these stories, to convince ourselves, why it isn’t worth it after all, to try out that new thing, or to get started.
  • We start to come up with all these excuses, just in order to remain in that power-saving mode.
  • And we pessimistically talk ourselves out of everything, since it’s a dangerous place out there, and who knows what can happen. Right?

Can you see the negative downward spiral?

And it’s all caused by all these negative stories that we keep telling to ourselves.

And since we keep feeding our minds with these theories, we start to live in this small bubble, in this limited reality, that we’ve created for our own selves.

3) Because it’s uncomfortable and exhausting

uncomfortable and exhausting

Truth being told, it’s not easy, and it’s not fun to get out of your comfort zone.

Especially if we got used to it too much.

It feels so good to be in there. Right?

  • It feels safe.
  • It feels comfortable.
  • Plus, we don’t have to use any extra energy, and no risks are involved.

The problem is, that it’s so easy to get stuck in there, without even realizing it.

Here’s the deal.

If you only did what was comfortable and safe, what life would that be? (Ask yourself that.)

But let me put it this way, and let me ask you another question.

Have you ever wanted something so bad, that you would have given anything to have it, or to feel that again?

  • To feel that unconditional love again?
  • To be recognized by someone you truly respect?
  • Or to have the girl you’ve always wanted in your arms?

Have you?

have the girl you've always wanted

Now ask yourself, how would it feel like, IF you didn’t do anything to have that feeling.

Because, that’s exactly what you should ask yourself, when you feel like it’s getting too uncomfortable or too exhausting.

It’s a hard choice.

Remaining in your comfort zone vs. stepping out against that fear of missing out.

But if you want something you’ve never had, you have to do something you’ve never done.

And trust me, if your WHY is big enough, then that uncomfortable feeling won’t matter that much anymore.

Right now, you are at step 1/10, in the 10-step system on how to find your ideal partner.

Continue the system with the next small bite, here.

If you don’t know about this system yet, BUT you truly want to find your ideal partner, then see the full 10-step system here.

Thank you for reading through. If you liked this post, please consider subscribing to my newsletter down below, for more dating and relationship advice.

Until next time.

Take care.

Thomas Kallos Find Your Ideal Partner

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