The moment I got myself into dating
- On day zero, I could approach zero women.
- One year after, I found my ideal partner.
This was the moment I got myself into dating, based on a true story.
It was my first week of being an Erasmus student in Bratislava.
I had the opportunity to meet many great people from all around the world that week.
We discovered the city, had a few drinks together, and there was this party we went to on Saturday night.
I dressed up in a shirt, arranged my hair, put on some perfume, and I was ready to have a great time on the opening party.
It started like a usual party.
Drinking, dancing and singing together with my friends.
Which is great.
There was something missing.
I wanted something more.
I simply didn’t want to spend all my night getting drunk, while listening to loud music.
Deep inside, I knew it was an excuse.
Because, what I really wanted was, to meet and talk to new women.
- To get to know them.
- To be around them.
- And to have a great time with them.
Basically, if I liked someone, I just wanted to be able to walk up there, say hi, and get to meet them.
But usually, the whole night went by, and I left the party, without getting to know anybody.
It was this party on Saturday night.
The time was 2AM, and I was ready to go home already.
BUT, before that, I decided to play a little game and to challenge myself.
“Approach 3 women.
Just say hi.
You have 1 hour to do it.
That was the challenge I had to finish, before I left the party.
Here’s the plan.
Just walk over there.
And the rest will follow.
Shouldn’t be a big deal.
Those were the exact thoughts I had at that moment.
Yet, I was able to come up with ALL the excuses possible.
Literally all of them.
“After this song.”
“I just need one more beer.”
“Ahh. I need to go to the bathroom.”
“She is too good.”
“She isn’t that good.”
“I don’t like this song.”
“What should I say to her?”
“No worries, I still have time.”
And when I finally got the courage to step in and say hi, they already left the spot.
I even challenged myself for a FINAL APPROACH after I ran out of time, and gave myself an extra 2 minutes, but that didn’t work out either.
- I just couldn’t.
- I wasn’t able.
- I simply FROZE.
My legs wouldn’t take the first step.
As if I wasn’t in control of my body or something.
And I got inside my head instead.
Overthinking and overanalyzing everything.
And the final result?
Leaving the club with ZERO approached women.
Really? You weren’t able to say hi, at least to 1 girl?
HOW IS THIS EVEN POSSIBLE?
I can’t believe myself.
This can’t be me.
This is not who I want to be.
How can I be so dumb?
Enough of those BS excuses.
Not even 1 approach?”
And it went on and on.
I remember telling all this out load to myself on the street, while I was going home alone after 3 AM.
But that was THE REALITY, and I’ve finally managed to face it.
It hurt so much.
To see myself as someone, who isn’t even capable of saying hi.
My ego was in pieces.
My pride was, too.
And deep inside, I knew this was the reason for all that procrastination.
Because I knew, that if I give it a shot, I might have to face, that I’m not good enough.
Which isn’t a good feeling.
Which isn’t motivating at all.
But we have to let go once and for all of that ego, if we truly want to improve ourselves and to become better.
Especially us men, since we have a bigger pride than women.
And to have that honest reality check.
Without any BS excuses.
Without any misleading explanations towards ourselves.
And that was the moment I got myself into dating.
After a party on Saturday night.
On day zero, I was able to approach zero women.
And almost exactly 1 year after that, I found my ideal partner.
By the way, we met in a club.
And funny enough, I just said hi.
That was how I started.
And that’s exactly how you can get started and find your ideal partner as well.
Seems too good to be real?
Well, I believe if I could do it, then you can do it as well.
- Of course, if you can remove your ego.
- Of course, if you can put aside your pride.
- And, of course, if you are truly ready for a change.
Thank you for being here and reading through.
If you feel like you also want to find your ideal partner, and you are a person who can put their pride aside, then reach out and let me know.
Until next time.
Thomas Kallos – Find Your Ideal Partner